Isaaq and Meriam have more problems

Meet Meriam and Isaac. They have four children. These are Nora (11 years), Ileas (8 years), Hana (4 years) and Noah (2 years). Meriam and Isaaq are very worried. Isaaq is afraid that he will lose his job because of Corona and then will not have enough money. They are also afraid for the health of their family and children.

It’s too busy at home

It is very busy at home. Meriam and Isaaq are more stressed now. They
want their children to listen to them. The children are full of energy and
do not listen. Isaaq gets angry more often. He also punishes the children
more often.

Isaaq and Meriam are feeling stressed

Isaac and Meriam are under a lot of stress. They don’t know what to do and feel insecure. But they don’t talk about it. Sometimes Isaaq gets angry at the children quickly.

Isaaq is often angry

Isaaq is under so much stress that he is stricter with the kids. He screams and slaps Ileas. Sometimes he also grabs him roughly. The children don’t understand why. They are scared and do not feel safe.

Meriam’s head is full

Meriam is very tired. She finds it hard to look after the children. Meriam thinks a lot. Her head is always full. She doesn’t see what her children are doing and doesn’t understand what they need. She doesn’t talk either.
The children don’t understand why mummy doesn’t talk.

Children need to feel safe

Now, the children are often scared and sad. To grow up as happy and healthy children, Nora, Ileas, Hana and Noah need to feel safe. Now that is not possible. It is important for children to safely play, learn, think and grow up.

Meriam and Isaaq make rules

Meriam and Isaaq don’t want their children to feel scared and sad. They want to give them love and attention. But they also want to give them rules, so they don’t have to hit or yell. They think about their own behavior. They talk about it and agree on some rules. They decide Isaac will try to:

• Stay calm by not reacting immediately.
• Take a walk outside if he can’t manage to stay calm.
• Give compliments to the children when they do something right.

Isaaq stays calm

Isaaq stays calm and doesn’t react immediately.

• He does this by closing his eyes.
• Taking a deep breath.
• And he counts from 1 to 10 until he feels calm.

Isaaq gives a compliment

He compliments Nora and Ileas when they do something right.
The children are happy that daddy is doing better.

Meriam asks for advice

Meriam calls someone she knows and trusts. She gets advice. The advice is:

• Make a schedule together as a family.
• Also make some rules together.

Isaaq and Meriam make rules with their children

Meriam does this. She makes rules with the children like;

• We tidy up our stuff when we’re done playing.
• We eat together at fixed times at the table.
• We do our homework at a fixed time. When we’re done, we can play.

Click here for an example.

Sometimes more help is needed

Do you want to talk to someone about the problems at home?
Call your family doctor; the health care center, or the neighbourhood watch for advise.

• Would you like to talk to someone from an organisation about violence in your family? Call Safe at home (0800-2000), for help or advice. This can also be done anonymously, without giving your name.
• Are you very afraid that someone might hurt you? For example, if someone starts hitting or has a dangerous weapon in their hands. Cal 112. By asking questions, someone on the phone will decide who to send (the police, fire brigade or ambulance).
• You can also talk to someone in your neighbourhood. Someone you trust.

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